When I Grow Up...

When I grow up, I want to be an Intergalactic Space Pirate. Maybe I will be so infamous they will make comic books and TV shows about me. Maybe a movie or two. That would be pretty cool. Now I’m pretty excited to grow up!

My Thoughts

Sometimes I think it would be fun and/or interesting if I had intelligent thoughts. So the other day I decided to sit down and think about how public schools stifle the creativity of their students through their focus on standardized testing. I soon became bored with that and proceeded to see how many Oreos I could fit in my mouth.*

*4. That’s how many Oreos I fit in mouth before I couldn’t resist the urge to eat them anymore.

Weddings...

Wouldn’t it be sad if someone missed their older brother’s wedding because he thought that his brother was just joking and the rest of his family was in on the joke? Yeah, that defiantly did not happen to me last weekend.

Robots...

Science has proved that robots will take over the world on or around April 16^th, 2032. In preparation for this day I am practicing my robot dancing and robot noises so I can assimilate faster in the hopes that our new robot masters will think I am showing great initiative and give me better treatment. I urge you all to do the same.*

*No. Robots are not making me write this. That would be ridiculous. You have a crazy imagination. What did you think? A couple of robots kidnapped me and forced me to write whatever they told me? That would never happen. My computer wrote it for me.